• barsoap@lemm.ee
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    1 year ago

    If you want to challenge them then how are b) and c) prerequisites? Where’s the challenge when it’s already there? If you want to be challenged then are you ready to be challenged in areas other than that? What if someone wants you to challenge to b) eat healthy home-made food every day and c) develop the grace and skill to tame a social situation with smalltalk, instead of insisting that every verbal utterance be a philosophical dissertation?

      • barsoap@lemm.ee
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        1 year ago

        What happens when you two disagree on what would actually be an improvement?

          • barsoap@lemm.ee
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            1 year ago

            What if you judge it as vapid because it doesn’t align with what you consider valuable improvement? What if it’s nigh impossible to express verbally?

            …all I’m saying, basically, is that there’s unknown unknowns. Too much goal focus ensures that they’ll always stay that way.

            • AngryCommieKender@lemmy.world
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              1 year ago

              I was specifically thinking of a woman who recently asked me why I wear black all the time, and when I replied “Ask Johnny Cash,” she got visibly confused and said, “Oh.” I’d have told her to either read the lyrics or listen to Man in Black, if she’d asked. I don’t know what to do with confused disengagement.

              • barsoap@lemm.ee
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                1 year ago

                she got visibly confused and said, “Oh.”

                Now I can’t read body language through text but maybe she had an assumption, that got destroyed, therefore she looked confused? It doesn’t mean that she didn’t know the lyrics or the man. Also do you enjoy being needlessly cryptic.

                I don’t know what to do with confused disengagement.

                Engage by reassuring, or changing the topic? Cracking a joke? (“Also, I’m way too lazy to colour-match”). Whatever.