And then the man looked at the camera and said “We don’t make mistakes, just happy accidents”

What fucking cemetery do you live near that has 12 ft skeletons buried in it?

I’ma sorry.

Yeah I don’t salt my pasta water, I chuck a shit tonne of chicken stock in there.

Jokes on you, wasting my life is my life’s goal!

You’re gonna need a big drink with that tho.

Nawww, then I have to go to Reddit… can’t I just offend the Italians on here?

You know that there’s no real rules about food, you can eat whatever you want with whatever you want, you can make a cheese and mayo sandwich using weetbix as the bread if you want.

Your stomach will tell you when you’ve fucked up.

I’ve been using that excuse for years.

Preventing installing outside of their monopoly is the correct term, not side loading, that’s just propaganda to make you feel bad for using your device freely.

This is why I stopped ordering from wish, I study the tracking like I’m investigating the cartel.

*Shrugs and continues chewing the bone.*

All it means is I got 141 2/3 chance of winning at Sakerfice.

That’s because they’re fucking idiots.

That house is 100% going: “Say whaaaaaaaat!”.

Even I know that.

We’re gonna end up in the Super Mario bros movie dystopia.

Then you really got into a conversation and forget how long the cable was and the phone got shot back against the wall breaking it or you rip the entire phone off the wall, either way you’re grounded.

That’s just forced perspective.