Important clarification/FAQ
I am not calling to coddle or excuse the behavior of bigoted men in any way!
I am calling to be kind and understanding to young men (often ages 10-20) who are very manipulable and succeptible to the massive anti feminist propaganda machine. Hope this clarifies that very important distinction. :)
Very good comments that express key points:
- Detailed summary of the situation if you’re wondering what’s going on
- The rhetorical value of the bear hypothetical and what this means for you
- One example of why the long-term rhetorical value of the hypothetical is poor, in the context of intersectionality
- What does disenfranchisement mean in this context?
- The importance of not asking women to tone down their expressions of fear and frustration
- “But why can’t they just say it nicely?”
- The importance of participation in kindness toward young men, specifically outside the context of people speaking their experiences
Edit: This post has now been removed and restored twice. I want to encourage you all:
Be decent to one another
I think this post is a valuable thing given the current state of the Fediverse, please don’t fuck it up for us by being toxic in the comments.
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That’s fine. No one is forcing you to be around unknown women. And those women aren’t going to be offended that you don’t want to be around them. Those woman aren’t going to call you completely irrational for choosing not to be around them. Those women aren’t going to demand that you empathize with them. You are free to feel however you want.
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Then why is this post filled with men upset that unknown women don’t want to be alone with them?
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Why would anyone do that? No one wants to be sexually harassed. That’s the point women are trying to make. They don’t want to be sexually harassed either, that’s why they are choosing the bear.
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Let’s just make this clear.
IT’S NOT ABOUT YOU!
Seriously, you don’t have to take it personally. Women aren’t saying they’d rather be alone with a bear than you, specifically. Just as all women aren’t the same as the women that have harrassed you, you are not the same as the men that have harrassed them. You, specifically, are not the man they’d choose a bear over. You are not the subject of their feelings. Stop taking it personally, and you won’t feel bad.
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