Have you ever worn chainmail without an undershirt? Or gambeson? It feels neat at first. Never had to worry about pinching. It didn’t grab any hair. The metal will feel cool and smooth all night. But oh Lord, the awful pain it will bring to unprotected virgin nipples. Like surfing for a hundred years without a rash guard all in one hedonistic night concentrated on the area less than two dimes. NEVER AGAIN. A couple bandaids or pasties the next time and all is good.
I think you’ll be fine with just a top sheet between you and the chainmail.
Great until it grabs some skin or hair
Everyone knows you’re supposed to wear a gambeson beneath your chainmail. Leather or padded cloth is best.
Ergo, full body gimp suit before bed
Oh good so I just need the chainmail.
I’m so very scared. Help.
I understand that reference
I don’t.
A not quite twenty year old thread where a guy got his nuts pinched in a chair and asked the internet for help
https://www.fark.com/comments/2018473/Im-stuck-to-my-chair-Im-so-very-scared-Help-Details-In-thread
It seems very likely that I don’t want to click that, but I appreciate the clarification.
I can confirm that’s the source. Don’t worry about clicking it, most of the images are lost to time.
Which is a shame. It was hilarious.
Maybe we should have some kind of archive of the internet so this isn’t a concern! Oh wait.
Its okay really. Funny as hell at the time but none of image links have survived.
Remember the streetlight thread? That was another great one
There were a lot of good ones there. Then it enshitified. They started playing favorites and I left.
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Have you ever worn chainmail without an undershirt? Or gambeson? It feels neat at first. Never had to worry about pinching. It didn’t grab any hair. The metal will feel cool and smooth all night. But oh Lord, the awful pain it will bring to unprotected virgin nipples. Like surfing for a hundred years without a rash guard all in one hedonistic night concentrated on the area less than two dimes. NEVER AGAIN. A couple bandaids or pasties the next time and all is good.
I think you’ll be fine with just a top sheet between you and the chainmail.
So what you’re saying is, he needs to add nipple holes!
Inverse chainmail bikini
This explains the lesser known war cry of
“Don’t fire until you see the pink of their nips”
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And cover your nipples with bandages.